Destined for Entomophobia

"Entomophobia: a common fear of or aversion to insects and similar arthropods, and even other "bugs", such as worms. This condition causes a slight to severe emotional reaction, a form of anxiety or a panic attack."*

Yup. She's going to catch on to me. All this time I've been pretending I like bugs, but really, how long can you fool a toddler? Ants, potato bugs, lady bugs, even a daddy long legs here and there, okay. I'm fine with that. Kind of. Miranda--two years old and wonderful--loves bugs. She calls them "cute" and scouts them out all over the yard. She likes to hold them and she wants me to hold them and share in her joy of their bug-ness.

Don't get me wrong. I love that she loves them. I want her to grow up with as little phobic crutches as possible. What mother wouldn't want her daughter to be strong and brave?

But I'm afraid I'm already starting to ruin her. Example: She wants to hold ants. I'm not scared of ants, I just don't like them crawling all over me and I don't want to pick them up in case I squish them between my fingers. (Squished bug is almost as gross as live bug.) So, I get a paper, scoop up the ant with it, and drop it from the paper into her lovingly cupped hands. I even watch it wiggle around on her arm and call it "cute". So the other day, she sees a potato bug and wants to hold it. Without even asking me to get it for her, she starts running into the house to "get a paper".

Second example: Last night our family was sitting out on the porch enjoying the warm summer night. I look up above me, and there is a katydid on the house. I point it out to the family and back up to the door. Miranda and Jeremy are enthralled with it's faux leaf splendor. I am trying to protect myself and the baby, deciding whether to go off the porch or into the house. I know, I know. Katydids are the geeky-ist creatures ever. Mostly harmless, but let's be realistic--they do have WINGS. Later, I told Jeremy I was ashamed I was freaked out by it. I asked him if he thought Miranda noticed I was fleeing it's presence or not. He said she was totally picking up on my phobic cues.

What am I going to do?!? Is she destined to be scared of bugs because I TAUGHT her to ignore her NATURAL love of all creatures, including bugs?

*Excerpt from Wikipedia